1. Bad decisions make good stories.
2. The most powerful force in the universe is: gossip
3.A Sat-Nav should start its directions on #6, as I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my town.
4. Part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your internet history if you die.
5.Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
6. I can’t remember the last time I wasn’t at least kind of tired.
7.Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don’t want to have to restart my collection…again.
8. I keep certain people’s phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
9. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
10. I wish Google Maps had an “Avoid rough areas” routing option.
11. How many times is it appropriate to say “What?” before you just nod and smile because you still didn’t hear or understand a word they said?
12. Sometimes I’ll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
13. The badness of a movie is directly proportional to the number of helicopters in it.
14. I feel there is a need for a sarcasm font
15. No matter what happens, somebody will find a way to take it too seriously.
16. Everyone likes somebody who gets to the point quickly
17. Casual swearing makes people sound stupid.
18. Anyone can be calmed in an instant by looking at the ocean or the stars
19.Curiosity never killed anything except maybe a few hours.
20. Facebook is the best means of communication - not talking.
21. Not everything you cook is edible.
22. Getting post which isn't a bill is such a thrill these days.
23. Everything can be fixed with enough sellotape, glue and staples.
24. Special offers have such an influence on your shopping technique.
25. I don't think puns have ever been so popular.
26. Checking your e-mails can be a great excuse to get out of an awkward situation.
27. Wikipedia and dictionary.com are the fountain of all knowledge.
28. iphones can't physically go in a pocket, but must be out and accessible at all times.
29. It's a little known fact that the Dark Ages were caused by unresolved Y1K issues
30. A paper clip is just a baby coat hanger.